Second Saturday
Momentum. Consistency. Keeping with it. Not giving up. Determination. These are the character traits that help anyone get to the next level in almost all facets of life. Then there are these as well: trust, surrender, patience, intuition, not forcing, waiting, reading the moment and reacting accordingly. Success, I believe, lives somewhere in between these two poles—finding one’s way in the space between sheer willpower and dogged determination, and sweet surrender and trust, letting the moment come without force or extra effort.
On this second Saturday in my new role as the Voice of the APTL—a sunny and warm day here in Indianapolis just after the spring equinox—all I can think of is showing up. Showing up to this blog post and not being intimidated by the moment, reporting as accurately and honestly as I can what this last week of training and navigating the complexities of transitioning more and more toward tennis has felt like. The short answer: it has been hard. It has been a long road over these last several years just to get to this point—the point where co-founding a league and building a tennis ecosystem is even remotely possible; and the point where being on a tennis court seven days a week, for hours at a time, and actively training toward a deeply meaningful goal—one that I’ve quietly held for years but maybe, unknowingly, have held all my life—is actually a thing that could happen, a life I could step into.
The difficulty isn’t just the commitment to the goal, the determination not to give up; even more so, it’s that sense that no one out there is listening and that I am simply living, thinking, and dreaming into a void—taking on a challenge and pursuing a goal ––– to play pro tennis ––– that might not move the needle for anyone beyond myself and those who know and care about me most.
So what makes it easier? This: the APTL. Not because I’ll play in the league (I won’t), but because the league means this dream is far greater than what happens with my own personal journey. It’s a prayer, a petition, a journey into competitive tennis that has a limited timeline, but one that, if I get to where my coaches believe I can, could echo out well beyond these next few years.
Do I have to “make it”? No—I just have to keep showing up. No matter how things unfold, I’ll be here, committed: running, training, telling these stories, and building the APTL alongside everyone who believes in it. Win, lose, or anything in between, I’ll keep opening this window into the league and into the journey—mine, and everyone’s, who is bold enough to step on court and reach for something more.
And that’s what make screaming into the tennis void, and the petition to the tennis gods worth it. As these weeks and Saturday posts keep ticking away, I can feel it: sooner rather than later, I’ll be playing matches and tournaments, and the rubber will meet the road. But for this week—more miles, more reps in the gym, more forehands, backhands, volleys, and serves, as preparation mode remains engaged.
